1) What's the difference between ang-mor and Hokkien fairy tales? Ang-mor fairy tales begin with: "Once upon a time..." Hokkien fairy tales begin with: "Lim Peh ka li kong..."
2) Teacher: "Class, do you know the meaning of parents?" Ah Beng: "Yes, teacher, it means father and mother" Teacher: "Good. Can you give me an example?" Ah Beng: "Sure. Cowboy's parents means cowboy's father and mother. Also can say Cowboy's father is Cow Pay & Cowboy's mother is Cow Boo. So together we say Cow Pay Cow Boo (KPKB)" The teacher fainted.
3) Two Hokkien pengs, Ah Beng and Ah Seng, got promoted from privates to corporals. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Ah Beng says, "Eh, Seng ah, there's the NCO Club. Let's go inside and togo." "But we all is plivate only, mah," protests Ah Seng. "No, we all is copler now," says Ah Beng, pulling him inside. Once inside the pub, Ah Beng says, "Okay, let's order some beer and togo!" "But we all is plivate!" says Ah Seng. "Piang eh, you cannot see, meh?" says Ah Beng, pointing to his stripes. "We all is copler now!" After leaving the NCO club, Ah Beng and Ah Seng go to Geylang. There, Ah Beng whistles at a hooker, but the hooker says, "Sorry, hor. Tonight cannot because I got gonorrhea." Ah Beng pulls Ah Seng to the side and say, "Eh, you go and check the dictionary and see what 'gonorrhea' means. It it's okay, give me the okay sign." Ah Seng goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Ah Beng a big thumbs-up. Three weeks later, Ah Beng is in the hospital with a severe case of gonorrhea. "Ni na beh," he scolds Ah Seng. "Why you tell me it's okay?" "Not my fault!" says Ah Seng. "In the dictionary, it says gonorrhea affects the privates." Then he points to his stripes: "But we is copler now, mah!"
4) During the Japanese Occupation, 3 Singaporeans, Ah Meng, Ah Seng and Ah Beng were caught for smuggling. They were sentenced to death by firing squad. That night, Ah Meng came up with a plan. He told the others that the Japanese were afraid of natural disasters. So he would cause them to panic, and escape in the confusion. The next morning, Ah Meng was led to the wall. The firing squad was lined up and the Captain commanded, "Ready.. Aim..", but before he could complete, Ah Meng shouted, " Earthquake!! Earthquake!" The Japanese soldiers panicked and Ah Meng made his escape. Later, the soldiers took Ah Seng out and the firing squad were ready. The captain commanded, "Ready... Aim..." This time Ah Seng shouted. " Flood! Flood!!" Again, the Japanese soldiers panicked and this time, Ah Seng made his escape. Observing all this, Ah Beng began to get the idea. "It's important to get the timing right." Soon, it was Ah Beng's turn. "Timing, that's the key.." Ah Beng kept saying to himself. The soldiers lined up in front of him. The captain started, "Ready..." "Timing," Ah Beng thought to himself "Aim..." "Okay," thought Ah Beng, and shouted, " FIRE!!! FIRE!!! "
1) What's the difference between ang-mor and Hokkien fairy tales? Ang-mor fairy tales begin with: "Once upon a time..." Hokkien fairy tales begin with: "Lim Peh ka li kong..."
2) Teacher: "Class, do you know the meaning of parents?" Ah Beng: "Yes, teacher, it means father and mother" Teacher: "Good. Can you give me an example?" Ah Beng: "Sure. Cowboy's parents means cowboy's father and mother. Also can say Cowboy's father is Cow Pay & Cowboy's mother is Cow Boo. So together we say Cow Pay Cow Boo (KPKB)" The teacher fainted.
3) Two Hokkien pengs, Ah Beng and Ah Seng, got promoted from privates to corporals. Not long after, they're out for a walk and Ah Beng says, "Eh, Seng ah, there's the NCO Club. Let's go inside and togo." "But we all is plivate only, mah," protests Ah Seng. "No, we all is copler now," says Ah Beng, pulling him inside. Once inside the pub, Ah Beng says, "Okay, let's order some beer and togo!" "But we all is plivate!" says Ah Seng. "Piang eh, you cannot see, meh?" says Ah Beng, pointing to his stripes. "We all is copler now!" After leaving the NCO club, Ah Beng and Ah Seng go to Geylang. There, Ah Beng whistles at a hooker, but the hooker says, "Sorry, hor. Tonight cannot because I got gonorrhea." Ah Beng pulls Ah Seng to the side and say, "Eh, you go and check the dictionary and see what 'gonorrhea' means. It it's okay, give me the okay sign." Ah Seng goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Ah Beng a big thumbs-up. Three weeks later, Ah Beng is in the hospital with a severe case of gonorrhea. "Ni na beh," he scolds Ah Seng. "Why you tell me it's okay?" "Not my fault!" says Ah Seng. "In the dictionary, it says gonorrhea affects the privates." Then he points to his stripes: "But we is copler now, mah!"
4) During the Japanese Occupation, 3 Singaporeans, Ah Meng, Ah Seng and Ah Beng were caught for smuggling. They were sentenced to death by firing squad. That night, Ah Meng came up with a plan. He told the others that the Japanese were afraid of natural disasters. So he would cause them to panic, and escape in the confusion. The next morning, Ah Meng was led to the wall. The firing squad was lined up and the Captain commanded, "Ready.. Aim..", but before he could complete, Ah Meng shouted, " Earthquake!! Earthquake!" The Japanese soldiers panicked and Ah Meng made his escape. Later, the soldiers took Ah Seng out and the firing squad were ready. The captain commanded, "Ready... Aim..." This time Ah Seng shouted. " Flood! Flood!!" Again, the Japanese soldiers panicked and this time, Ah Seng made his escape. Observing all this, Ah Beng began to get the idea. "It's important to get the timing right." Soon, it was Ah Beng's turn. "Timing, that's the key.." Ah Beng kept saying to himself. The soldiers lined up in front of him. The captain started, "Ready..." "Timing," Ah Beng thought to himself "Aim..." "Okay," thought Ah Beng, and shouted, " FIRE!!! FIRE!!! "